Hey look, yet another kid's movie has reached the summer box office. You would never guess it, but there was a marketing person sitting in the dark somewhere strumming their fingers together in that classic diabolic contemplation about how to increase profitability. The obvious answer is to make a marketing game, and the fruits of their arduous two weeks of labor have brought us Space Chimps. Now, even though I know I am painting this in a bad light instantly, there are a few rare redeeming moments. Overall as a game player, advocate, and a parent of gamers, I am a tired of seeing this in gaming. It really does make sense on paper to make these games, but the execution always leaves something to be desired. Do I have a solution? Well, this isn't the place, but one of them is to stop making these types of games.

Now that I am off my soap box for a second, one of the better things to come out of movie games, especially CGI or animated ones, is that the cut scenes and character graphics are usually very well done. Space Chimps is no exception, for the characters, that is. The rest of the environments are a mix of minimalist feng shui and oversized desolation. You see the character, an enemy, and a power-up. No more than two or three POI (Points of Interest) or flair to be seen. Now, one school of thought might say that this is so the player isn't confused, but the contrary is that the two or three things you do see in a level distract you because you spend time wondering, "It's here, so does it do anything?" They obviously had the same issue when developing, or they wouldn't have to put giant flashing lights above everything so the player would know what to do. I will speak more of this below.

The ambient music I can only assume was from the movie itself, but was well done and never distracting. The repetitive sound effects were everything I expected given what looked like a rushed development. In the case of this game, I would say that the fact the sound didn't make a huge impression is a good thing. The music was, by far, the best aspect of the game. Technically speaking about placement and timing, it was well done. It just needed some variety in the attacks.

Space Chimps is a 3D platformer/puzzle game. Based on elements of the movie, you are a group of three chimpanzees sent into space. In the tradition of the first chimp to be launched into space, his grandson Ham III is placed on the mission along with two real space chimps. Our game lands us inexplicably into an altercation on an alien world, where Luna gets swallowed by a huge beast. You take on the roles of Ham III and Luna. The problem is, wasn't there another chimp star in the movie? Talk about getting written out. Funny thing is that he appears on the website. From the very beginning of the game, there is a confusing progression as to what is happening, where you are in the story of the movie, or if you are even a part of the movie. Common sense told me that because the opening cut scene to the game placed me on the alien planet, that it had to be someplace still in the movie. I have admitted to not seeing the movie, but according to reviews, neither have many others. After you complete each level, you are rewarded with another snippet of the main story, but honestly, after the second level, you really don't care. The website does a better job of informing the gamer where they are and what is going on than the gameplay.

You don the persona of your chimp and complete each level. You are provided with standard melee attacks for Ham III, but it seems that his accomplice Luna gets all of the cool toys. She acquires the assistance of two different alien life forms to assist her. The first is Squirt, whose tongue makes an excellent whip for melee, and the fact that he squirts a shot of acid doesn't hurt either. You can use this acid to kill things or as a tool to knock down obstacles. She also gets a Fluttereye that allows her to fly around.

During the main game, you will collect items called Globhoppers. These items will unlock bonus content such as clips from the movie and concept art. There is also a mini-game called Fluvian Run. You fly on the back of what looks like a giant manta ray creature and shoot down other flying creatures, as they return fire on you. There is nothing else really to this short game.

Space Chimps can be more frustrating than difficult. I see an honest attempt to guide the player along the rails of each level using flashing indicators and way too subtle text on-screen. The problem is that they seem to have been placed there after the level was designed, because you actually have to wonder what to do. I think that I am becoming a true believer in training your player, especially your younger player forcibly, at first, through "Pause and Prompt" and not "Die and Learn." Then to further your frustration, there are the the ever-famous horrible camera angles.

The puzzles are arbitrary and unintuitive. It really feels like they sat down with a book called "101 Door Puzzles." I think if you had any inkling of what was going on with the story of Luna being inside the belly of the beast, you would feel like there was a reasoning for what you were doing. You had to be reminded by NPC's where you were, because it didn't feel like you were inside of anything living. I had forgotten I was even swallowed by the time I got to the second mission of the game.

Movement in the game is very simplified. You control your movement with the left thumb-stick on the Nunchuck. You can recenter your camera with the (Z) button on the Nunchuck. You jump using your (A) button, and attack with the (B). You will spend the majority of the game jumping and attacking. The only issue I had with the controls is that they use the (-) on the main controller to use or pick up items. The kids I played with had a hard time getting used to this because they haven't been trained to use the (-) on other games. Plus, with small hands moving around the controller, they had a hard time physically pulling it off.

I also encountered several bugs while playing the game. Four times, I became stuck inside of objects or walls. The main culprit was disappearing blocks as they respawned. I also entered areas where there were supposed to be moving mechanisms to jump to and from. It was only after I committed suicide trying to cross them that they began to animate. Also, when I initially booted the game, the disc wouldn't read, but it worked after I reset the system.

I haven't really pulled any punches in this review, and there was nothing to warrant me to lighten up my barrage either. This game is tantamount to making an overpriced breakfast cereal. Kids want it because they see Space Chimps on the outside of the box, but there isn't even a toy inside. I know (I am speaking to the development people out there, as well) that it is nigh impossible to make a game, let alone a good game, in the short time developers are given. Small development houses leap at the chance to do them because it means money to work and to be able to chase after the game they really want to make. Knowing the vicious cycle that is marketing game development, who can put an end to this? I don't know, but I hope they do fast. It is partly this type of mentality that led to a gaming console crash in the 80's. Poorly done marketing and sales driven gaming nearly killed it for us all. I know this is an extreme comparison, but how long will parents fall for cereal box advertising?

I am beating the game up mostly because I honestly believe parents are being tricked into an unredeemed game experience for the money. But, buggy gameplay in today's market is a problem that is hard to recover from. What I really fear is that one day, a game development company is going to get it right, and no one will trust them to even try it. The best thing to pass on about Space Chimps is that technically, it met all the requirements to get it on the shelves, but that's about it.